Diet Daze
By Ruth Y. Nott
Copyright 2002
When we find ourselves avoiding the scales and our clothes are a bit too tight,
Then here we go again, starting a brand new diet.
No matter which one you try, the trials are always the same...
Temptation comes in many forms and goes by many a name!
At 9 a.m. - day one - you're sitting behind your desk
thinking of slinky new clothes and the sweet, sweet smell of success.
Smell?... sniff... sniff... your stomach begins to quiver!
Fresh hot donuts approaching! Your body begins to shiver!
Down the aisle comes Susie Slim, "Hey Sally, ya wanna bite?"
You close your eyes and hold your breath, and wave her frm your sight!
Somehow the morning passes and you take your salad to lunch.
But where do you end up sitting? Between pizza and Nestles Crunch!
The conversation passes along - from potatoes, to meatloaf, to pie...
You look at the lettuce upon your plate and tears well up in your eyes!
At five o'clock it's time to go. You walk shakily to th door.
But before you reach it your telephone rings, "Ma, can you stop at the store?"
Steadying yourself upon your desk, you ask him what he needs.
"Oh, just something to snack on, some cookies and choc'late ice cream?"
Well, he's just a growing boy, not hampered by extra pounds.
You'll just have to walk those aisles, no matter how hard it sounds.
Maybe you'll check the diet food, try to find something tasty,
some sugarless candy or salt-free chips, nothing to make you "waisty".
But when it comes to dieting, always remember Rule One -
No matter how the package reads, - no salt, no sugar - NO FUN!
Now get in your car and drive before the ice cream melts...
past Burger King and Wendys and Hardees and Taco Bell.
You'll make it through your dinner. You'll make it through dessert.
You'll make it through all those commercials - if you don't go crazy first!
And when you kneel beside your bed and tell God the whole morbid story,
you can ask Him to take you off one list, 'cause you've been through purgatory!
